I don’t have resolutions, I don’t have goals

For the past few days, most of the posts I have been reading talks about new resolutions, new goals, big and small. New beginnings for a new year.
It struck me – more forceful than I liked – that I have neither a resolution, nor any goal set, big or small, for the New Year.

I felt kind of odd, realizing that while I’m a part of this blogging community, of this world, I don’t have the same set of rules that most have. I do know that there are others like me, but I hadn’t realized that I’m actually a part of a small minority.
It made me pause and think back over the years. I have had resolutions but they don’t come every year, and they are far apart, very far apart.
Goals, on the other hand, is something I haven’t had for more than a decade. The last one I had was to become a doctor – a surgeon.
Life interfered time and again, and that goal became a dream, one that I eventually let go.
And it was only these past days while I read posts about goals and resolutions that I realized I haven’t had any goal since I let go of that last one. (I suppose the stem cells treatment I want to try is a goal as I’m very determined to do it, but that’s an expensive treatment, so it’s a goal set far in the future).
Oh, I do have plans, but they aren’t set in concrete, and I can always change or postpone it without too much disappointment.
Like planning to go out with friends – if things come up, you can always change your mind or postpone it for later, no fuss.
And no, I don’t plan my year ahead, or even make new plans for a new year. I make them as I need them, and mostly they are small ones that I know I can see through on my own, but if I don’t and no one helps me, well, I do get disappointed, but if it’s a plan I’m set on, I change tactics and try to do it in a different way. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.
If it does, I check it off the list, move on to the next. If it doesn’t, well, I either adjust the plan, or I make a new one.
But I have no resolutions, no goals to see through.

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40 Replies to “I don’t have resolutions, I don’t have goals”

  1. I think most set goals ect this time of the year just to feel good, the gyms will be full of new comers in January but they will all disappear in February, I want to do more charity work in the new year but I think that’s already happening and ties in with me working a lot less now. Just do what you feel is right and most of all be happy 🙂 x

    Liked by 2 people

  2. For me, New Year is just another day. Besides, we also celebrate Chinese New Year so in just a month, it’ll be a “new year” again over here 😃

    As for setting goals, I’d set one anytime I feel like it. I don’t have to wait for a New Year. That’s how I’ve done it since when I was a child.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. i used to set goals that would leave me seriously disappointed if i couldn’t reach it. more like dreams that i wish to achieve. i make plans now, like planning what’ll cook or read next, things that are subject to change with little fuss. i have dreams still, but i know they are dreams – sometimes they come true, most times they don’t.
      chinese new year? how much is it now? over five thousand, i think, but that might b the hebrew.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I have now reached a point in my life where I’m happy enough to worry about setting impossible-looking goals that much. I still set goals, but they are all minor, like coming up with a shorter proof for a theorem that has a very long proof or to learn something new (at this moment, my goal is to learn Japanese).

        I’ve set impossible-looking goals before but I wasn’t really that sad if I didn’t achieve it. I’d just move on. For example, in 2008, my goal was to break the 10-second barrier for completing a 3×3 Rubik’s cube. I’ve trained for more than 6 months and then I averaged around 13 seconds. It may be slow now, but at the time, it was fast (the world record was 9 seconds then). However, I suddenly became interested at reading Chinese literature during that time. This messed up my momentum and I never got any faster no matter what I did. While I was a bit disappointed that I didn’t achieve my goal, I didn’t give it much more thought and just moved on…

        Of course, I’d rather achieve the goals that I set :). For example, when I first started practicing sleight of hand magic, my goal was to master the Pass (a difficult card sleight). It took me almost 8 years before I can say that it’s good enough but at least, I attained my goal 😀

        I think that even most Chinese are not aware of it (since most people thought of the Chinese years as Year of the Dragon, etc.) but the Chinese calendar is now approaching year 4716. Yes, it must be the Hebrew calendar as it’s now currently year 5778. Another calendar that reached 500 was the Mayan Calendar. Remember the nonsense of World Apocalypse last December 2012? That belief came from the fact that the Mayan Calendar “ends” at around year 5280 and Dec. 21, 2012 was that date. But what these conspiracy theorists didn’t tell you was that the “end” means an end of a “Great Cycle” (this happens every 5280 years). So after the Great Cycle, the calendar would be reset to zero.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. the last goal i can remember setting for myself was to become a doctor. but right at the time i applied and was accepted, i began losing my vision. of course , like any sane person, i postponed college until i recovered, which i never did. and i don’t think anyone would want to be treated by a blind doctor, so obviously i never persued this goal. and, , i knew about the mayan calendar, though not the 5k cycle.you’re always a fountain of knowledge.

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  3. Great post. I’ve not made any resolutions for more years than I care to remember, but from this point on I will make an exception: to reduce the amount of plastic I buy/use and to be more ‘earth conscious.’ The planet needs us.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Wishing you a rewarding new year. It sounds to me that you are living your life in the way that works for you at this time, despite challenges and changes. It also sounds very sane and realistic. Best wishes to you.

    Like

    1. Good question. I have plans for my book – which might equal goals to many, but a goal for me is something I set in stone – something I will keep at until I see through. At the long run, publishing my book could be considered a goal, one I made five years ago when I decided to start writing, but one I didn’t see through as I put it down and only picked it again last year.
      My plan, however, is to try to publish it early spring. It’s a flexible plan as doing everything on my own isn’t as easy – or is harder than I anticipated.
      I suppose my ‘plan’ is what other people will call a goal. But at the end, it all comes down to how you see it.
      Maybe you can use it for your next re-define!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I really think I might write about this because I’ve noticed this big push against resolutions/goal setting, and every time I see someone write/post about it, I’m thinking, but I thought you had a goal. And now you’ve got me thinking about the difference between words like plan and goal.

        Liked by 1 person

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